This is going to be my primary blog one day, however at this time it is just a place saver for me as I slowly transfer my old blog entries to this blog. My regular blog is
www.crazymennonite.blogspot.com
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Sunday, July 31, 2005
Early Birthday
What a lovely evening :) Andra and Matt picked Chris and Angie and I up and we went out for Greek food. Very tasty. Although I had a lot of leftovers and left them at Mandra's. Poo. Oh well. Chris bought my dinner as a birthday gift. What a sweetie. Then we dropped Angie off at a friends and the rest of us went back to Mandra's. We sat around and chatted and played Big 2 and they gave me a gift! A neato new craft called Quilling. I didn't open it cause I'm gonna save it for GA, I think. The result of the quilling is a bunch of beautiful snowflakes. Matt apparently said in the store that then I would have snow, even in Georgia. Awwww! They also got me a nice cross stitch that says something along the lines of 'wherever you go, may God be with you'. So nice. AND a mini container of Jelly Bellies. ANNNND, the best part...they gave me this awesome necklace a couple of years ago, a silver chain with this beautiful dark blue stone in it. It is the necklace I wear most. I adore it. And today they gave me matching earrings!! And my fave kind of earrings too, the kind that dangle just slightly. Purrrrrfect :)
Then Chris kindly offered to cab me home cause it was POURING. Like, seriously, flooded streets and sidewalks. The cab was so steamed up that I do not know how the cab driver could see. And I was very lucky. Earlier in the evening my chain had gotten so tangled in my hair that Chris had to spend a while detangling it, so I just took it off and put it in my purse. When I emptied my purse at home, it was gone. I was so sad, but thought 'what can I do'. But then it occured to me that it might have been in the same purse pocket as my keys, and fell out when I pulled them out. I went back down to the lobby and there it was. SO lucky! Oh! And Chris gave me a great backrub. Good evening!I also had a good sleep last night, and got several important things done in the afternoon. Great day :)
Then Chris kindly offered to cab me home cause it was POURING. Like, seriously, flooded streets and sidewalks. The cab was so steamed up that I do not know how the cab driver could see. And I was very lucky. Earlier in the evening my chain had gotten so tangled in my hair that Chris had to spend a while detangling it, so I just took it off and put it in my purse. When I emptied my purse at home, it was gone. I was so sad, but thought 'what can I do'. But then it occured to me that it might have been in the same purse pocket as my keys, and fell out when I pulled them out. I went back down to the lobby and there it was. SO lucky! Oh! And Chris gave me a great backrub. Good evening!I also had a good sleep last night, and got several important things done in the afternoon. Great day :)
Saturday, July 30, 2005
In the midst of the war, He offers me peace.
Oh my. I have so many things to say...this will either be an incredibly long post as I relate it all, or a very short one because my fingers have fallen off.
1) Heeheehee. As I reread this blog, I realize that I tend to write as I talk, in sort of a free-form, free association kind of way. Thus the comment from my future-mom-in-law that says I indicated that she and dad-in-law and Paul and Smeag and I would all be sleeping in one bed! *giggle* My bio mom is so terrific, but not...you know...funny. She thinks that Readers Digest jokes are high art. But both my past and future moms-in-law are really funny and seem to get my weirdness.
2) I got an email from my granny (well, the exes granny, but I have none of my own so she can stay 'granny'). Yay! During my worst emotional times I tended to blather about how much my ex had hurt me and I alienated granny and Karen, so it was great to know that Granny is still talkin to me. *beam*
3) You have no idea how many emails and/or comments I have gotten about this kafka/stomach/dreams thing. Many different opinions. Don't think that this makes me believe that my honey is not completely a cracked coconut though! That's why I like him so much ;) (And vice versa, I think).
4) A while ago, Paul mentioned that his ex was Pentecostal. He mentioned this as though it was mildly, well, freaky. My response, as I recall, was 'um, so?" As he then explained (including getting the m-i-l on the phone with us) was that she was a snake handler. Well not anymore, but in her youth. I had NO idea about this. So I lookeded it up. Sure nuff. Some Pentecostal sects are snake handlers. Totally fascinating. One site I viewed said that it was kind of a combination of disillusioned Methodists and other Protestants and various African religions etc. And then today there was a thing on NatGeo channel about it. The minister, I must say, was -hysterically funny-. Not, um, on purpose. He was the biggest redneck I have ever seen...which is not a slam on him, I tend to marry rednecks. I could barely understand him ;) (the websites also mentioned that a lot of Pentecostal snake handlers are from the Appalachians [nuff said]) He actually said 'venison' instead of 'venemous' at one point. Whoo. It was funny as shite. But he was really cute with the snakelets. He was showing the interviewer that the snakes were not defanged, so he picked one up and he was like 'hi honey, I'm sorry I have to do this'. He handled her very sweetly and kept going "Oh, Hallelujah" kind of under his breath in a sort of monotone, I-say-this 5000 times-a-day kind of way. And when he had showed us the snakes fangs, he said "Praise Jesus". A couple of times I wanted to giggle, cause its so foreign to me. But hey, first of all, to each his own. And second, in many ways it seems like a good basis for a religion. Loving animals is God's way, certainly. They treat the animals well, and the snakes almost seem to...enjoy the handling. As well, apparently the sect of Pentecostals that handle snakes are extremely racially varied. And that is beyond excellent. The God I believe in would certainly approve of a religion that gets people of all colours together in a spirit of love. So...okay, it seems a wee bit strange to my Canadian/Eastern European/Mennonite eyes and ears. But I have the utmost respect for them. And I always enjoy acquiring more knowledge.
5) Paul was so busy this week and is now away for the weekend, so I barely talked to him this week. Plus my final divorce decree was delivered this week. These things seem unrelated, but it made for a bit of a tough week. I just...never expected to be a divorced woman. The whole Tim-disappearing-one-day-and-moving-to-TX-with-another-woman-and-having-a-baby-with-her-right-away thing was just so utterly shocking. Its very hard to move past this. Well, let me clarify. I have no desire to be with Tim anymore. I don't miss him. He's a completely different person than I thought he was. I don't hate him, or dislike him, I just don't care anymore. However, the manner of his leaving was so...incredibly disconcerting. Its just made it a bit hard to trust. Unfortunatey, that is the legacy that my first marriage has left me with. Fear of abandonment.
Paul is so so so good to me though. He knows of my fears and calms them at every turn. I love him so very much. And for only the second time in my life, I believe with all my heart that he loves me as much as I love him. He wants to make a family with me. Oh damn, I'm gonna cry again...which leads me to ...
6) My parents are celebrating their 45th (!!!) anniversary today. I'm so proud of them. They have been such an amazing model of what a Christian marriage should be. *wipes tears* My mom says that she wouldn't change a moment of the 45 years and that she loves my dad 10 times more every day than the last. And she says that she believes that Paul and I will have that. And I think that we really do. My Paul is...my angel. He not only makes me so happy, but makes me like myself so much more. He thinks I'm beautiful. He loves me the way I am, not despite the way I look. He likes talking to me and laughing with me. He makes me laugh 30 times a day and when I giggle, he giggles too and tells me how much he loves to hear me laugh. When I'm sad he holds me if I'm there and if I'm not, he says 'nono, no sad! And is goofy and gentle and soft until I'm better.
How could I have gotten so lucky. For 20 years I was depressed. And now, I have it all. I have a new home in a beautiful climate and environment. I have a man who adores me and who I adore back. I have a pug who is so cute and perfect that I have no problem picking up her poop off the floor ;) I have great friends who love me so much that they offer to beat up the bad guys who hurt me. I have a pseudo nephew who is so perfect he makes my heart hurt. I have a real nephew and 3 nieces who call me 'auntie Jenn' and who say the greatest things. Especially one niece who is a little version of me and who is so infinitely huggable that I could snuggle her little brown body all day. I have a new family who I like so much! I've spent so much time fretting lately about immigration and customs and the divorce etc that I forgot to praise God for all I have. I am truly truly blessed.
1) Heeheehee. As I reread this blog, I realize that I tend to write as I talk, in sort of a free-form, free association kind of way. Thus the comment from my future-mom-in-law that says I indicated that she and dad-in-law and Paul and Smeag and I would all be sleeping in one bed! *giggle* My bio mom is so terrific, but not...you know...funny. She thinks that Readers Digest jokes are high art. But both my past and future moms-in-law are really funny and seem to get my weirdness.
2) I got an email from my granny (well, the exes granny, but I have none of my own so she can stay 'granny'). Yay! During my worst emotional times I tended to blather about how much my ex had hurt me and I alienated granny and Karen, so it was great to know that Granny is still talkin to me. *beam*
3) You have no idea how many emails and/or comments I have gotten about this kafka/stomach/dreams thing. Many different opinions. Don't think that this makes me believe that my honey is not completely a cracked coconut though! That's why I like him so much ;) (And vice versa, I think).
4) A while ago, Paul mentioned that his ex was Pentecostal. He mentioned this as though it was mildly, well, freaky. My response, as I recall, was 'um, so?" As he then explained (including getting the m-i-l on the phone with us) was that she was a snake handler. Well not anymore, but in her youth. I had NO idea about this. So I lookeded it up. Sure nuff. Some Pentecostal sects are snake handlers. Totally fascinating. One site I viewed said that it was kind of a combination of disillusioned Methodists and other Protestants and various African religions etc. And then today there was a thing on NatGeo channel about it. The minister, I must say, was -hysterically funny-. Not, um, on purpose. He was the biggest redneck I have ever seen...which is not a slam on him, I tend to marry rednecks. I could barely understand him ;) (the websites also mentioned that a lot of Pentecostal snake handlers are from the Appalachians [nuff said]) He actually said 'venison' instead of 'venemous' at one point. Whoo. It was funny as shite. But he was really cute with the snakelets. He was showing the interviewer that the snakes were not defanged, so he picked one up and he was like 'hi honey, I'm sorry I have to do this'. He handled her very sweetly and kept going "Oh, Hallelujah" kind of under his breath in a sort of monotone, I-say-this 5000 times-a-day kind of way. And when he had showed us the snakes fangs, he said "Praise Jesus". A couple of times I wanted to giggle, cause its so foreign to me. But hey, first of all, to each his own. And second, in many ways it seems like a good basis for a religion. Loving animals is God's way, certainly. They treat the animals well, and the snakes almost seem to...enjoy the handling. As well, apparently the sect of Pentecostals that handle snakes are extremely racially varied. And that is beyond excellent. The God I believe in would certainly approve of a religion that gets people of all colours together in a spirit of love. So...okay, it seems a wee bit strange to my Canadian/Eastern European/Mennonite eyes and ears. But I have the utmost respect for them. And I always enjoy acquiring more knowledge.
5) Paul was so busy this week and is now away for the weekend, so I barely talked to him this week. Plus my final divorce decree was delivered this week. These things seem unrelated, but it made for a bit of a tough week. I just...never expected to be a divorced woman. The whole Tim-disappearing-one-day-and-moving-to-TX-with-another-woman-and-having-a-baby-with-her-right-away thing was just so utterly shocking. Its very hard to move past this. Well, let me clarify. I have no desire to be with Tim anymore. I don't miss him. He's a completely different person than I thought he was. I don't hate him, or dislike him, I just don't care anymore. However, the manner of his leaving was so...incredibly disconcerting. Its just made it a bit hard to trust. Unfortunatey, that is the legacy that my first marriage has left me with. Fear of abandonment.
Paul is so so so good to me though. He knows of my fears and calms them at every turn. I love him so very much. And for only the second time in my life, I believe with all my heart that he loves me as much as I love him. He wants to make a family with me. Oh damn, I'm gonna cry again...which leads me to ...
6) My parents are celebrating their 45th (!!!) anniversary today. I'm so proud of them. They have been such an amazing model of what a Christian marriage should be. *wipes tears* My mom says that she wouldn't change a moment of the 45 years and that she loves my dad 10 times more every day than the last. And she says that she believes that Paul and I will have that. And I think that we really do. My Paul is...my angel. He not only makes me so happy, but makes me like myself so much more. He thinks I'm beautiful. He loves me the way I am, not despite the way I look. He likes talking to me and laughing with me. He makes me laugh 30 times a day and when I giggle, he giggles too and tells me how much he loves to hear me laugh. When I'm sad he holds me if I'm there and if I'm not, he says 'nono, no sad! And is goofy and gentle and soft until I'm better.
How could I have gotten so lucky. For 20 years I was depressed. And now, I have it all. I have a new home in a beautiful climate and environment. I have a man who adores me and who I adore back. I have a pug who is so cute and perfect that I have no problem picking up her poop off the floor ;) I have great friends who love me so much that they offer to beat up the bad guys who hurt me. I have a pseudo nephew who is so perfect he makes my heart hurt. I have a real nephew and 3 nieces who call me 'auntie Jenn' and who say the greatest things. Especially one niece who is a little version of me and who is so infinitely huggable that I could snuggle her little brown body all day. I have a new family who I like so much! I've spent so much time fretting lately about immigration and customs and the divorce etc that I forgot to praise God for all I have. I am truly truly blessed.
Friday, July 29, 2005
ONE WEEK!
That is SEVEN DAYS!!! Aka ONE HUNDRED SIXTY EIGHT HOURS!!! Til Paul and his parents and Smeagol and a king size bed and unlimited snuggle time on the couch. *wiggles frantically*
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Warm Fuzzy?
In the middle of a conversation:
Him - "You know what I like?"
Me - "What?"
Him - "Chinese chicken salad."
Me - "Aw, I was expecting a warm fuzzy there."
Him - "Oh! Oh! Rewind!! (makes grbty rewind noises) You know what I like?"
Me - "(laughing) What, honey?"
Him - "I like you! And I like how we're a family! And I like your blue eyes! Yuh, I do!"
Ah yes, the boy has been married before. He knows how it works.
Him - "You know what I like?"
Me - "What?"
Him - "Chinese chicken salad."
Me - "Aw, I was expecting a warm fuzzy there."
Him - "Oh! Oh! Rewind!! (makes grbty rewind noises) You know what I like?"
Me - "(laughing) What, honey?"
Him - "I like you! And I like how we're a family! And I like your blue eyes! Yuh, I do!"
Ah yes, the boy has been married before. He knows how it works.
Dream Words
I slept very little again last night, spent most of the night crocheting (I'm getting a lot better). But then at like 7 this morning I was exhausted and fell asleep for 5 HOURS NONSTOP. It was the most amazing thing ever. When I woke up I was so disoriented, but the weirdest part was when I woke up, the first thing I thought/saw was the words 'warm winter'. They were emblazoned on my retinas, in cursive, all lower case. Very weird!
EIGHT MORE SLEEEEEEEPS!!!!!!!
EIGHT MORE SLEEEEEEEPS!!!!!!!
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Bettah!
Okay, today has been going much better than yesterday. First thing this morning I called about my lease again and was told I could walk over and pick it up. I also gave postdated cheques til the end of October and got rental receipts from January onward. That stuff has been on my to-do list for months, so I'm thrilled to have it done. Then, since that went so well, I called the ex's lawyer back to ensure that she had either sent the corrected decree or I was gonna give her my friend Angie's fax number so I could get it more quickly. But she right away knew who I was and said that she had sent it yesterday. She took it so seriously that she asked me if I could please fax her a copy of the partially crossed out decree so she could get to the bottom of the problem.
Excellent! 9 more sleeps!!!
Excellent! 9 more sleeps!!!
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